so that I'm not a total failure at April.
1) Our office manager has a candy bowl on his desk. I call it that only because it is a bowl filled with candy, and not because it is a purpose-specific hand-etched crystal that Gracious Home would try to sell you for $32.50. This is important to note because if the fine founders of Gracious Home (I like to think that their last name is actually "Gracious") saw what was in the bowl today, they would undoubtedly have a conniption fit. Or possibly the vapors -- I'm not sure how old-timey they are.
In the bowl today are individual, unwrapped gummi bears, which one must scoop from the bowl with a plastic spoon. They're all stuck together in a little free-range gummi orgy, and if I see someone try to eat them, I will likely have the vapors myself.
2) I walked by a store that sells "Baby and Teen Furniture." Why no children? Does this store hate children? Do they really only like selling cribs and whatever it is that teens use? What IS it that teens use? I imagine these as things made of skateboards and old pizza boxes because I am 87 years old, but I cannot be sure. TEENS -- what is your furniture, and why do you demand special treatment?
