Excellent thing: I'm in this class at the New York Public Library, and they are paying me to read and write and hang out with other teachers and eat way too much catered food.
Not-so-excellent thing: I am expected to complete 750 words of "food writing" by Friday.
Here's the thing about food writing: it's amorphous. It's nothing and everything and a little bit crazy and a little bit boring. Describe the sandwich that you ate today. Bam! Food writing. Recall a recipe your grandma gave you. KaBoom - food writing! Tell me why artichokes are considered a sexy food. Woohoo! Food writing (and thanks for explaining it because seriously - do you know what they do to your digestion? It's the opposite of sexy).
I came in with some ideas, but the more I research (fine, attempt to research. I am stupid at computers.), the less clear I am on what I want to do or how to do it. I feel like I'm lacking some revelatory food experience that would anchor my story. I don't "experience" food - I just shove it in my face. I haven't had a supremely memorable meal that changed my life. My family doesn't have recipes that have been handed down. My grandmother made fried baloney sandwiches. My parents cook a lot of pasta. I eat nachos almost every meal.
I enjoy food. I have questions about it. I want to talk about it with other people. I just don't know - based on what I have to offer them - that they would want to talk about it with me. I have 3 days left to write, and I am stuck. I'm in hot water. My goose is cooked. I'm in a pickle. My sandwich has no mayonnaise. I'm one egg short of a carton. (I promised puns - but not good ones.)
So, hey, here's an idea: help me. M'aidez (that's "help" in fancy French restaurants). What can I write? What food experiences do you want to re-live? What food questions do you need answered? I have some ideas below - vote on these or write in your own.
- All you can Kill Buffet: A friend of mine recently suggested to me that you shouldn't eat anything you wouldn't be able to kill. That effectively strikes spiders from my diet (I can't bear to get close enough to smash them), but what about other critters? Do I really need to kill, or consider killing, them to enjoy their tender flesh?
- Home Cooking: I'm curious about what I consider my "childhood food": Italian sandwiches, whoopee pies, lobster (but not lobster boil), boiled dinner. Where does Maine "cuisine" (haha) come from? If it were the French, why don't we have more poutine?
- Home Ec: Don't really know where this piece is going. I think I'm still just mad that I got a B for burning my waffles in 8th grade.
VOTE NOW or STARVE (intellectually speaking. I will not take your food. Unless it is poutine.)
