Sweeney Todd: The Unlicensed Surgeon of Fleet Street
Sweeney Todd: The Overly-Gregarious Dentist of Fleet Street
Babar the Elephant King and his Lollipop Song
Sweeney Todd: The Scurrilous Haberdasher of Fleet Street
Sweeney Todd: The Surly Pig Farmer from that Farm North of Fleet Street. No, not that one. The other one. North. Yes.
That Promiscuous, Dirty Handed, Sweet and Salty Noted Fashion Photographer: You Know Who He Is, Even Though you Don't Want to: A Cautionary Tale for the Children: Sweeney Todd
Sweeney Todd: The Pugnacious Ocularist of Fleet Street
Sweeney Todd: Story of My Life
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Thought crumbs
I was walking past a fancy-pantsy lingerie store yesterday.
Okay, none of that is true. I was walking. And then I happened to pass a lingerie store. And, by essence of it being a store for undergarments, it was actually the opposite of "fancy-pantsy."
But I digress.
I walked past this fancy-schmancy lingerie store yesterday, and a big sign in the window said "Fall/Winter Collection is in!" My mind then exploded and dribbled out of my ears because how can you have "Fall/Winter" underpants? Are they made entirely of fur? Do they smell like cranberry sauce (which would be amazing!)? Are the nipple areas on the bras covered with those little paper doilies people put on the ends of turkey legs? Honestly, this last one was the VERY FIRST THING that I envisioned. I'm a sick-o.
Also, I just realized how gross the word "crumbs" (see title) is when paired with the idea of underwear. I actually had another, entirely unrelated, anecdote to share in this same posting -- hence that very clever title, which says, "I thought these things were funny, but I can acknowledge that they are pathetically short." -- but now I've totally forgotten it.
Okay, none of that is true. I was walking. And then I happened to pass a lingerie store. And, by essence of it being a store for undergarments, it was actually the opposite of "fancy-pantsy."
But I digress.
I walked past this fancy-schmancy lingerie store yesterday, and a big sign in the window said "Fall/Winter Collection is in!" My mind then exploded and dribbled out of my ears because how can you have "Fall/Winter" underpants? Are they made entirely of fur? Do they smell like cranberry sauce (which would be amazing!)? Are the nipple areas on the bras covered with those little paper doilies people put on the ends of turkey legs? Honestly, this last one was the VERY FIRST THING that I envisioned. I'm a sick-o.
Also, I just realized how gross the word "crumbs" (see title) is when paired with the idea of underwear. I actually had another, entirely unrelated, anecdote to share in this same posting -- hence that very clever title, which says, "I thought these things were funny, but I can acknowledge that they are pathetically short." -- but now I've totally forgotten it.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Pathetic Thought of the Day
I was in the shower this morning (woo!), thinking about the exciting day ahead: the inane e-mails, the pointless phone calls, the repeated bashing of my head against my desk as I wondered what I was doing at this place.
Suddenly, I realized that all was not lost. "thelaurenbell," I said to myself, "Today is not just any old painfully tedious day; it's a painfully tedious Friday!"
"And that means only 3 more days until the new Gossip Girl!"
So went my personal pep talk this morning.
I am 23.
Suddenly, I realized that all was not lost. "thelaurenbell," I said to myself, "Today is not just any old painfully tedious day; it's a painfully tedious Friday!"
"And that means only 3 more days until the new Gossip Girl!"
So went my personal pep talk this morning.
I am 23.
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